August 2, 2022
I was baptized as an infant and was confirmed when I was 13. Mom and Dad made sure I got to church and Sunday school so I’ve been around a long time in church.
But I had my conversion in my late 30s. ‘Conversion’ comes when the Holy Spirit cracks that hardened heart and suddenly we’re aware of all that we are and have been and that our greatest need is Jesus. With that cracking of the heart comes tears. Copious, copious tears often coming in surprising times and circumstances but they come. Crying is a human, naturally driven catharsis. It helps to relieve that something in us that is so deeply unhappy. We can have a broken heart over losing someone we love or any number of other things that make us so unhappy but the tears of a Spirit-cracked heart is different because it’s about us alone. The badder we think we are, the bigger and deeper that lake of tears. We come face to face with the ugliness of ourselves and our lives and cry for that person we’ve seen in the mirror all our lives.
And we cry because through Jesus, we don’t have to stay that person. He heals the crack in our hearts with a kind of bandage that expands as our love for Him grows. The tears are the release of the ugliness and the bandage is the knowledge of His love for us and why He died and was resurrected and ascended into heaven to sit on the right hand of His Father.
The tears dry up and we can breathe deeply again and find joy again and find understanding of ourselves and of Jesus. It’s an amazing thing.
I watched this video this morning and it moved me, especially when Kris said he was “crying – in front of people”. I know. I’ve been there, too. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1tA7E7pbUws
Words on the Word 
I know how that cathartic flood of tears feels because it happened to me and I was over sixty when it did although in the deepest recesses of my heart I think I always did believe but I just wasn’t ready or willing to admit it to myself.
More Special Editions please. That was excellent. Love the bandage analogy.
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Perhaps you could help me and then I can ‘help’ you by adding other Special Editions. Because it is my blog, I don’t see what you see when you click on your notice. Today – did you see both the St. Luke 13 post as well as the SE post or how does it appear?
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When I clicked on the link from the email in my inbox I just got the SE.
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Scratching head … hmmm. The blog is really about the NT readings. I don’t want it to be about me. I think SE will be rare if what people see is that instead of the NT posts.
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If I go to the blog via my saved bookmarks then I see your very first post from whenever you first started way back with the comments underneath. Then I have to click on WOTW heading and all your posts come up with the most recent on the top. Then I click on whichever I want to read and the whole post comes up. To comment I have to click on ‘comments’ at the top.
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Thanks for your help.
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Thank you Audre’ for this mornings’ post. You made an excellent explanation of those of us who always knew about God, but when we come to “Know Jesus” we really understand what He has done for us. May God continue to inspire you as you continue writing. Love and hugs.
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Oh, Betty! Bless your kind heart! Thank you.
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