Welcome to my world.

October 23, 2022

I went to bed at 10:30 last night. Woke up this morning thinking it must be around 6-6:30. Imagine my surprise when I turned on the computer and found it was 1:36 a.m. Three hours sleep. Sigh.

I’m fairly used to short sleep. Happens more frequently than I like to admit. But I just wake up – ready to go. There is no ‘turning over’ and going back to sleep for me. Gotta get up and get the day started. Sort of reminds me of that old song, “My Future’s So Bright (I Gotta Wear Shades). Just ready to start a new day, I guess.

But I’m not overly fond of the long, dark hours of what is essentially still night. It can be lonely, that’s for sure. My husband is a superb sleeper (go figure!) so I try to be as quiet as a mouse and not wake him. I’d like to wake him and have him keep me company but I’d like to see my next birthday, so I don’t (wink!)

So … it’s just me and God. He’s a wonderful friend. After Morning Prayer, we chat. Well, He lets me do most of the talking actually but you have to love a friend Who wants to listen to you. All the time. I’m not very exciting and there isn’t all kinds of busy-ness in my life but He doesn’t mind, I still get the occasional insight and He still pats my head – ‘good girl.’

Did I tell you that God lives on my ceiling? Yes; He does. When I speak to Him out loud, as I am wont to do, lol, I always look up at the ceiling. He’s up there overseeing my computer and computer room. I keep it neat and orderly so He won’t be afraid to hang out with me and He makes sure I don’t head in the wrong direction on the internet. We’re a great team.

The trick is … Sunday mornings. My local church was a casualty of the virus and had to close for good. (Why do they call it ‘good’ – it was tremendously emotional and not in a good way) There are no other churches in my diocese jurisdiction and so I have had to resort to online churching. But I found an exceptional church in Fort Valley, Georgia and I am now a member. Wonderful priest and parishioners at Christ the Redeemer – very welcoming and friendly and they are my church family now.

But getting back to Sunday mornings … since I’ve been up since 1:36 a.m (notice my exactitude, lol) by five or six this morning I will begin to fall asleep at my desk, head hanging to the side (I can’t imagine that this a pretty sight). I will then get up and drag myself off to bed. But Sunday adult study at CtR is at 9:30 on Zoom and depending on how tired I was when I crawled back into bed, it can be an iffy thing being ready for people to actually see me. I once got dressed and hair brushed in 12 minutes! But between broken sleep and racing to look presentable, it can be exhausting and make it difficult to be bright and cheery and eager to learn. Sigh. It’s not easy being me.

So this morning’s plan is to go back to bed at 5; it’s an unheard of thing for me to sleep for four hours as a nap. If I did, I’d still have half an hour to get dressed and brush my hair and be wide awake and an active participant in Bible study. That’s the plan, anyway. I’ll let you know how it works out.

In case you were wondering, it’s now 3:13. A. M. Sigh.

Advertisement